Saturday, August 29, 2015

The Covering of Holiness



674
153,000,000
256,258,538
1
3

A. Number of kids on Reece's Rainbow from China
B. Number of orphans worldwide
C. Average number of Americans identifying themselves as Christian
D. Number of children I personally knew of that died alone this week.
E. Number of children I know of this month alone that were disrupted and sent back to their orphanages after a family came for them.



Christians you mock this being you call God. If humanity has failed in this, then surely you are far more culpable. I cannot release you  from your part in this tragedy.

Evil has lulled you into a sense of comfort and you never even saw it coming for you. Your church attendance, your Sunday School teaching does nothing to alleviate you of this guilt. One died this week, three in the last two weeks disrupted and were left behind. I cannot begrudge our sweet Katie for her entrance into heaven, but I can cry that my human race failed her during her time here. I can break for all the comfortable Christians raising their hands in worship and never seeing the evil in their own hearts.
I can and I am angry for these numbers.



I want to cover the shame of humanity from the gaze of a Holy God. 
We.do.not.deserve.Him.
I have never felt so utterly ashamed of humanity as I have since I have seen the hundreds of faces cross my eyes in the last few years; the hundreds that I see daily who are never even inquired on, not a soul caring about them individually. I have never understood until now what surely Adam and Eve felt when they clothed themselves and hid in the bushes.
I have never known and felt the strength of His holiness as much as I have in my own shame. 

And I have never been so humbled to recognize His grace. As one people, we have committed genocide. Our hands are stained with the death of millions of children. Do you feel the weight of our combined sins against humanity? Hear me in this, He sees our evil, our complacency, our willingness to allow children to die, be bought, be sold as the cost of our comfort.
And yet, His hand extends to us....
Grace.



Grace to cover the cost of these lives. Grace to make us flawless. And I sob knowing what He chooses not to hold against us.
In this understanding I found myself late last night on my knees, asking God to help me choose this unacceptably generous gift for myself and for my human race and more achingly for those who claim His name, His holiness, and yet mock him in their comfort.
I want to tell you to do better. 
I want to tell you to do more.
But that isn't grace.
It angers and humbles me.
Grace is scandalous that way.

I do not deserve to be seen in the light of His righteousness.
You do not deserve the covering of His holiness.
But Grace has been given to you, to us.
Let's hold it well.









1 comment:

  1. This is so good, Katie! I'm new to your blog. I'm a young-adoptive-parent-in-process (this will be our first adoption from China). I have been convicted in the past handful of years over selling others over the "cost of my comfort." The bigger home, vacations, cars, you name it. I sat in church service as I watched "on fire" Christians hoop-n-hollar, raising their hands, and preach fire-and-brimstone while going home afterwards to the comforts of their little families and homes. I, myself, wasn't a whole lot better. I'm tired of living a life that's so contrary to what God is calling us to lead. God's Word far from preaches living earthly lives of comfort -- far, far from. "Blessed are the meek. Humble. Suffering." I look at the disciples and the lengths they went for their Lord, Jesus. Even costing their lives.

    The other day I posted about our future little one, and that all the fees, paperwork, stress, and waiting is SO worth it. Then I thought -- and of course, just as our dear Savior showed us, they are worth DYING FOR. Every time I see a child be advocated for through a blog, site, or group, those are the words that run across my mind..."Worth. Dying. For." Most of humanity, even Christians' actions sure don't show that though.

    I'm enjoying your blog. Thank-you for taking time out to write! Your words of wisdom (along with others) are truly helpful for those of us who are especially new to all of this. Thanks so much.

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